Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Update

I'd like to take a few minutes to say thank you to you.....


You see... I've been a bit absent from my blog. The truth is, I have been working through some difficult times and emotions. My family's 'calendar' is clear through most of the year, except for Miss M's birthday at the end of May. But come Halloween, the roller coaster ride begins. For me this year, it has meant the anniversary of my mother's passing and her burial (on Halloween), my first anniversary officially divorced (after 29 years), my son's birthday, my birthday, throw in Thanksgiving, Christmas, and the ex's birthday after the new year.

As a dear friend, J, recently said... 'You're not in the 'fight or flight' mode for the first time in years, so now you are feeling all of those emotions that you put to the side because you were in 'fight or flight'."

The holidays are portrayed by 'Madison Avenue' as a Norman Rockwell vacation...a time of love,
family, traditions and joy. Oh, how I ache for all of those things in my heart...in my being. But the truth is that, for many, there is also heartache, loss and sadness. I am working through all of these emotions...from love and joy, to loss and sadness. I am sure that I am probably not alone.

So...

I want to thank.... you.

You have patiently allowed me to take time to privately work through so many emotions. You have checked in on me to just say 'hi' and see how I was doing. My dear girl, Paige... thank you for your hug and your checking in on me... you will never know how tender and kind those gestures were and what they meant to me. All of you have allowed me time...and for that, I am grateful.

So, I thank you for your patience. I thank you for you kindness. I thank you for bearing with me. I thank you for your 'friendship'.

Thank you.

May your day unfold a special treasure for you tomorrow. You are most deserving of it!

6 comments:

Chickenbells said...

Oh...it's so weird that first year...well, and some kind of weird after that...but, it does get better after more time passes. I am glad you are taking time to feel everything though...that's the only way I got through it all. I noticed I rushed around like a maniac like I was trying to replace all the nervousness that accompanied my fight or flight...I'm getting ready to just pick out the small things in the season that are meaningful JUST TO ME...and embrace those and hold on to them...rather than trying to duplicate all the other thingsI used to do...it's too tiring for me now to do all of that...and I deserve to finally have a good time the way I want to...

Just like you do, my love! Keep hanging in there with all of this...it gets better...and remember to recognize all the magic of the season too...it may be small at first, but it's in the background jumping up and down waving its arms around...

Big hugs and kissed to you...

Julie said...

Oh I LOVE what chickenbells has to say and share..... so true to embrace what is meanigful to JUST YOU!!

Quite honestly my friend I can't wait to see you celebrate the things that matter to you and also to see what new traditions you will create. You my dear friend are a creative soul and so you will create new traditions and I hope to be a part of some of them!!

Miss you tons from rainy Seattle!!

J

Jolene George said...

I so think we need to meet this holiday season. I would love it. Perhaps for lunch.
Big hugs to you as you are dealing with so many things.

jessielavon@yahoo.com said...

passing by for a quick visit,come on over and sat a spell darling and see the Christmas give-a-way .

Jolene George said...

I've been thinking about you and wanted to check in to see how you are doing. I hope everyting is okay. Miss you...
(((squishy hugs)))
Love, Jolene

Mary Jo said...

VB, I know a bit of what you're going through. My mom passed away last December 23rd and I've been separated for almost 4 months (after 19 years of marriage). I appreciate all your encouragement via emails and comments you've sent me. Your words have most certainly helped me, and hope I can do the same for you in return. I've been going through a roller coaster of emotions, but instead of fighting it, I'm going with the flow because I know that's where my healing will come from. "New Traditions" is my theme for this Christmas season. I'm wishing the same for you and your family!

{{{VB}}} - God's blessings to you!