Tuesday, June 23, 2009

All This Bliss Is Wearing Me Out!

I'm tired. I mean tiiiiiiiiiii-eeerrrrrrrd. You know the kind of tired I'm talking about. The kind where at 9:20 in the morning, you are so wishing that you were home, in your pajamas, snoozing on your sofa instead of teaching children in summer school about geometric shapes. The kind where you drive in a daze to work, then when you turn off the engine, you don't remember the trip! The kind where Starbuck's doesn't even make a drink with enough shots of double-espresso to keep both of your eyes open for a minimum of 5 minutes. Did I say that I was tired?

I did?

Oh good. Cuz I'm tired.

The reason is simple. Lack. Of. Sleep. The protagonist is a little trickier. It's not because of my neighbor's barking dog. Or a sick daughter (like last week). It's most certainly not because I watched 'Jon and Kate mess up the lives of their children 8!' on t.v - what's entertaining about watching a family implode at the expense of innocent children?!!. Nor is it because I'm swinging from the chandelier with some super hunk man in my life. HAH! It's not a new puppy. Or that I've gone on a painting binge in my house! Nope. The reason is...


As silly as it sounds, I can't sleep because I'm so excited! What about? EVERYTHING!! Summer school being over in two days! Summer vacation starting in two days! My new bundle of joy arriving even sooner that expected! Days to read a book, work on a project or piddle in my garden! Mornings to spend out on the patio sipping creme brulee' coffee and watching nature pull back the covers of night. Having happy hour with women who are my strength, inspiration and buddies through thick and thin! An upcoming weekend with my sister - oh my, I can't wait for this event which we had to postpone from last weekend due to Mr. F. Lew! I haven't felt like this in a long, long time.

Last night I was so excited about my camera order that I couldn't sleep. No, really...I couldn't sleep! I read, tossed, thought, watched t.v., thought some more, tossed and turned some more, had some dark chocolate (at least 72% cocoa to receive the benefits of dark chocolate, by the way), checked email....and still I couldn't get to sleep...

until after 4:00 a.m. By then, what's the point? And this isn't the first night that this has happened these past couple of weeks.... try like the 8th or 12th??!??

My chica, N, had to laugh at me today. I stopped by her home for an impromptu visit on my way to the grocery store. I had dark circles under my eyes. Yesterday's hairstyle. A slightly slower brain. I told her it was due to the fact I couldn't sleep last night. 'What's wrong?" she asked with a concerned look of arched eye-brows. 'Nothing!" I replied. 'I'm just so full of joy" I said, with a matter-of-fact, mono-tonal delivery and half-opened eyes, slumped on her sofa. She laughed! "All this bliss is wearing me out!!" I muttered.

And I couldn't be hap.... pi....... e..... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz........


N-Search of Peace! said...

"Choosing bliss" my chica, is so much more rewarding and so gratifying than what others may have felt about it themselves. They see it as fleeting and non tangible. There are those of us that have proven them wrong. Welcome now chica to that club!

I so love the fact that it is kicking your butt!! And the JOY of that is indescribable isn't it?

It will eventually all level out. I mean the lack of sleep that is. As I always am in prayer for you daily, to always be looking up, I am so happy that you have heard the whispers of God's voice and heeded his direction.

You HAVE a badge of honor, my chica, in what trails and tribulations you have endured and conquered. You must, you must now, put them where they belong. In your past. Stand firmly present in your present and look up towards the light! Embrace the future (joy and bliss!) "with a happy heart and happy feet!"

Like a crazy women!

Joni said...

Isn't it wonderful to be high on life and to have that adrenaline going...bringing with it energy beyond belief...wow! just think of the things you could get accomplished and probably have! Good for you...enjoy every second of it before the hot weather claims its interest.

Chickenbells said...

Isn't joy the bestest reason not to sleep at night?!?! I mean, it surely beats the alternative! I know how you feel...I have been having so much fun as of late, I can hardly calm down to sleep and rejuvenate!

I am also going to give you a big hearty congratulations on your new bundle of joy!! You are going to LOVE having the SLR...the options are so much better, and you're pictures are so fantastic now...well, you're not going to believe how much better they're going to get...Rich really had a hard time choosing between the Canon and the Nikon the last time he bought a camera, because Nikon has some fantastic great lenses!! And if you ever need any help or new lenses...Tempe Camera is a wonderful camera shop...and I believe that they are also authorized camera repairs!

I can't wait to see what's next...I could certainly go for some chandelier hanging with a love...and now you have the means to take the best pictures possible!!

Grumperini said...

Doesn't "piddle" mean peeing in your garden?!? Ha Ha Ha

Sooo glad you're blissful, I'm sooo glad summer school is over, and I'm sooo glad vacation has begun.

I sent you a text message.... come over and swim when I get back from VA!

Connie said...

I stumbled upon your blog through a comment you left on The Pioneer Woman blog...and I must say, I can relate to so much of how you live and feel. I too really enjoy nature. I'm sure at times I must annoy my husband with my pointing at this beautiful flower or that awesome cloud... Come to think of it, my high-school-science-teacher Mom used to annoy us kids the same way! ha! Guess it's come full circle! Anyways, I can totally relate to your "All This Bliss Is Wearing Me Out!" post!!!
I've had many nights lately feeling exactly the same way. Thinking about our garden, planning the next project, feeling how full my heart is for the people in my life, wishing the night would hurry up and pass so I could get started on things! ha!
Then, I wake up all groggy and annoyed when our dog wants breakfast at 6am (I swear she really can tell time).
So, you see, you are NOT alone in these feelings of extreme bliss inducing sleeplessness!
Hope you find time to sneak in a nap!
Connie Q

Connie said...

p.s. Isn't dark chocolate a stimulant=contains caffeine...not that I wouldn't also eat a bite of it regardless of that fact in the middle of the night!

diving Boracay said...

just live life to the fullest and the way you wanted to..

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